The streets have forgotten: 12 of the least memorable Barclaysmen only true heads will know

Everyone knows about the likes of Hatem Ben Arfa, Adel Taarabt and Morten Gamst Pedersen – your classic ‘streets won’t forget’ cult heroes of the Barclays Premier League era.

But what about the players the streets evidently have forgotten? One poster on Reddit/r/soccer had the inspired idea to go through every Sporcle quiz of goalscorers in the Barclays era and list the names the fewest participants could remember.

Without further ado, here are the least memorable goalscorers of the Barclays era – with one per season from 2004 to 2016.

2004-05: Scott Dobie & Andreas Jakobsson

Two players were tied at the bottom with just 8.2% of quizzers remembering their names of the 2004-05 season, best remembered for Jose Mourinho’s imperial Chelsea and the first campaign whereby the top flight was officially known as the Barclays Premier League.

West Brom stalwart and former Scotland international Dobie featured. That was the year in which he fell out of favour at the Hawthorns and was transferred out to Millwall in November.

The not-at-all-prolific striker spent his almost entire career in the Football League, with 2002-03 the only season he regularly featured in the top flight.

Just as unmemorable was Jakobsson, who made 27 Premier League appearances for Southampton in 2004-05. Saints finished rock bottom that year and the Swedish utility man promptly returned to Scandinavia.

2005-06: Ognjen Koroman

A proper journeyman, this one.

Alongside his 36 Serbia caps in the mid-noughties, Koroman played in South Korea (Incheon United), Russia (Dynamo Moscow, Terek Grozny, Krylia Sovetov Samara) and four different clubs in his home country.

The winger also made four Premier League appearances for Harry Redknapp’s Portsmouth on loan in 2005-06, scoring one goal.

If this name somehow rings a bell, you must have a Rain Man-esque encyclopedic knowledge of the Barclays era. Just 6.1% of quizzers could recall his name.

2006-07: Arnold Mvuemba

Onto season three of the Barclays era and we’re maintaining our 100% hit-rate of players who played under Redknapp. Classic ‘Arry. T’rific.

The midfielder scored one goal for Pompey, on loan from Rennes, in 2006-07.

He subsequently joined the club permanently but only made a further 14 Premier League appearances before quietly returning to Ligue 1.

2007-08: Lewin Nyatanga

“I never really felt I’d end up at Arsenal or Barcelona” told us when we interviewed him a few years back.

“Did I walk around thinking that? No. I think I knew myself what my level was. I gave it my best and I knew where I was compared to the top players.”

Refreshingly honest about his career and limitations, former Wales international Nyatanga played out almost his entire career in the second and third tiers.

But he did make two Premier League appearances for that historically bad Derby County side in 2007-08 and scored once. Not many players can boast a one-in-two strike rate in the Premier League, fair play.

2008-09: Chris Basham

There’s a good chance you do remember this one, to be fair. But if you’re anything like us, it’s more likely to be for his decade-long service at Sheffield United.

‘Bashy’ (we can’t not hear his name in Chris Wilder’s voice) played an integral role in Blades’ revolutionary overlapping centre-backs system that resulted in a memorable finish in the top half in 2019-20.

Long before that, though, the defender broke through as a youngster at Bolton Wanderers back when they were a frequent fixture in the Barclays era. He notched one goal in 19 appearances for the club before moving on to Ian Holloway’s Blackpool.

2009-10: Stefano Okaka

This one surprised us. Just 5.5% of quizzers remembered the Italian striker scoring twice during his loan at Fulham in 2009-10.

We wouldn’t exactly put him in the ‘classic Barclaysman’ territory, but the one-time perennial Roma loanee had enough about him to stick in the memory.

Five caps for Italy. A ton of Serie A clubs on his CV. A stint at Watford before moving to the Pozzos’ sister club Udinese. Seeing out his career with Istanbul Basaksehir. He ticks a lot of boxes.

2010-11: Jelle van Damme

If nothing else, you can’t say Jelle van Damme doesn’t possess a hell of a name.

After a brief, forgettable stint at Southampton in the mid-noughties, the Belgian defender returned to England for a similarly brief, similarly forgettable stint at Molineux in 2010-11.

He made six Premier League appearances for Wolves and scored one goal.

2011-12: Simon Vukcevic

A curious spell at peak basket case Venky’s Blackburn Rovers punctuated a wild, eclectic career for the Montenegrin midfielder.

Vukcevic’s two years at Ewood Park landed between time in Serbia, Russia and Portugal but before Ukraine, Greece and Cyprus. You imagine he’ll have some interesting stories to tell from his travels.

2012-13: Urby Emanuelson

Nowadays an assistant coach at the youth team of his boyhood club Ajax, Emanuelson played 75 times for AC Milan during his pomp.

The Rossoneri loaned the Dutchman out to Fulham for the latter half of the 2012-13 campaign.

READ: The official ‘Barclays era’ Premier League table: No Leeds, Man City 5th

2013-14: Roland Lamah

Surely a Pointless answer to Premier League goalscorers if there ever was one, a surprising 11.3% of quizzers recalled the Belgian winger scoring twice for Swansea City – on loan from Osasuna – back in 2013-14.

We can recall precisely nothing about the bloke. This could be an elaborate Wikipedia scam and we’d be none the wiser.

2014-15: Silvestre Varela

Another footballer that we’d put money on being a regen, Varela might be familiar to Portuguese football buffs – he played over 150 times for Porto and earned 27 caps for the national team in the early 2010s – but his time in England can only raise a big collective shrug from us.

He scored his only goal for the Baggies in a 3-2 defeat to that dismal hodgepodge of a QPR team that finished bottom that year. Sounds about right.

2015-16: Matt Jarvis

Solid if unspectacular, we’re not entirely sure how Jarvis ended up on this list, having played made over 200 Premier League appearances for West Ham and Wolves in the Barclays era.

Almost all of the others that feature here came and went without making any kind of impact.

In fairness, we can barely recall him turning out for Norwich City in their miserable 2015-16 relegation campaign.

Jarvis made 19 appearances that year and scored once but never played for the club again, despite remaining on their books for another three years.

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