9 of the most p*ss-takingly sexy rabonas you’ve never seen ft. Spurs, Man City heroes
Lionel Messi whipping free-kicks is great fun and everybody loves a long-range screamer, but the rabona goal is undoubtedly the most outrageous yet equally gorgeous way a player can find the onion bag.
The art of seeing the goal, picturing the flight of the ball and being so desperate not to use your weak foot to the point where you’ll wrap one leg around the other and risk making a complete fool of yourself is an art not for the faint-hearted. So when it comes off, goodness gracious is it a jaw-dropper.
In tribute to the pinnacle of p*ss-taking, we’ve gathered together a collection of the naughtiest rabonas you’ll ever witness.
Timed his run to perfection. Played it right by the textbook. Peeled off his man and loitered to the penalty spot where everyone was expecting a diplomatic finish, nestled into the bottom corner.
Until the intrusive thoughts kicked in and Santos sent the ball curling into top bins with the naughtiest trick in the book – the page ripped out at the back because it’s simply too disgusting. Nasty.
Alô Puskas? 📞 @nunomsantos11 está a chamar 😎
— Sporting CP (@SportingCP) March 13, 2023
You’re thinking of the one against Arsenal, aren’t you? A brilliant finish, but it wasn’t even his best rabona, which is frankly absurd.
Lamela made the Europa League his playground in 2014 with one from outside the box.
When Erik Lamela decided to complete football in 2014 😱😱😱
An insane rabona goal! pic.twitter.com/xyfVFq4gFE
— Football on TNT Sports (@footballontnt) October 23, 2019
Combining the art of goal poaching in the box with the dark arts of the rabona? Sounds too good to be true, but it isn’t.
Enter 16-year-old Martins for Benfica. Sixteen.
— UEFA Women’s Champions League (@UWCL) September 7, 2023
A rabona finish in a way only Balotelli could possibly score one; an obscene and hilariously unnecessary amount of step-overs before eventually smashing it past the goalkeeper.
Remains one of the funniest finishes of all time.
🎩 Mario Balotelli'nin 5. golü! #Seviyoruzİşte
— beIN SPORTS Türkiye (@beINSPORTS_TR) May 22, 2022
What do you do when you’re in the box and painfully close to goal, but you’ve been forced down a corridor and shown a rather improbable angle?
Just shift it out of your feet and dink the goalkeeper with a rabona, obviously. Perotti deserved two goals for this.
— UEFA Europa League (@EuropaLeague) December 18, 2022
Right, technically this didn’t happen in a game, but you can’t do a rabona article and not include Quaresma.
The man made a career out of being allergic to using his left foot, by simply becoming so good at trivellas and rabonas that it no longer mattered. Exhibit A:
Ricardo Quaresma, the rabona king 🔥 pic.twitter.com/kU4OAyyc8F
— Oh My Goal (@OhMyGoalUS) July 2, 2020
Angel Di Maria
Everything about this clip is stunning. The baggy shirt. A young, scrawny Di Maria scrambling past the last man. The way he’s going wide but then pulls it together with the most ridiculous finish he can muster up, before wheeling away in celebration.
Keeper had no chance. No man’s land.
#OnThisDay in 2⃣0⃣0⃣9⃣
— UEFA.com DE (@UEFAcom_de) December 17, 2020
He gets a tad fortunate with the rebound off the defender coming back to him, but immediately makes up for it with the most insane, instinctive thinking ever.
Dinking a keeper is one thing, but dinking a keeper with a rabona, inside La Bombonera? Jonathan Calleri, take a bow.
LA RABONA DE CALLERI. pic.twitter.com/Qxmq0Mp2SB
— IBW 🇸🇪⚓ Boca Juniors (@InfoBocaWeb) December 8, 2015
No thoughts, no touch, just pure carnage. Chilean league circa 2011, we salute you.
Urbano had all the time in the world to take down the cross and get a proper shot off, but instead meets it first time in what is a truly spectacular show of technique. Could’ve very easily made a fool of himself, but instead bagged an all-time worldie.
La rabona de Matías Urbano (Unión San Felipe) frente a Unión La Calera el 2011 pic.twitter.com/hfZ88NCVIp
— Fútbol de Antes (@futboldeantescl) March 15, 2021