Ranking Ruben Neves’ 15 goals for Wolves from brilliant to ridiculous

There are some players that just don’t score bad goals, ones that you’ll spam the shoot button with on FIFA regardless of where you are on the pitch. Think Paul Scholes, Xabi Alonso and, more recently, Ruben Neves.

Neves has scored 15 goals for Wolves since joining them in 2017, earning him various Goal of the Month nominations, Youtube fame and links to the likes of Manchester United and Real Madrid.

We often do lists of this nature, but we’re not sure there are many that feature quite so many worldies…

=15. Spurs, Everton and Pyunik Erevan

Let’s just get the penalties out the way, shall we? He scored them all, so they were obviously good enough, but come on, they’re penalties. Unless he rabonas them, they’re always going to be bottom.

12. Wolves 1-1 Man Utd, 2019

The fact that this goal is so low down speaks volumes about what’s to come. Receiving the ball on the edge of the box from a corner, Neves takes two touches to set himself before stroking the ball into the top right corner. The fact that it bounces in off the bar makes it all the better.

It proved to be crucial too, earning his side a draw against United. For most players, it would be one of their better goals, it just so happens that Neves has scored 11 even better ones.

11. Sheffield Wednesday 0-1 Wolves, 2017 

It may look slightly less spectacular given he went for the bottom corner rather than his usual top bins, but his second goal for Wolves was still a damn good one.

Lurking on the edge of the box, a sight that would go on to strike fear into the hearts of every goalkeeper in England, Neves strikes the bouncing ball first time, somehow keeping it on the ground rather than whamming it into row Z like us mere mortals would.

10. Wolves 3-1 Arsenal, 2019 

Ruben loves a good free-kick, as you’ll be well aware off by the end of this piece. Coming in as the worst of them is the third he scored for the club, doing so against Arsenal.

We judge it as the worst because it was in a near-perfect position and Bernd Leno arguably could’ve done better stopping it. Yes, we’re nitpicking, but the goals are all this good, what choice do we have?

9. Wolves 2-1 Aston Villa, 2019 

Rather surprisingly/stupidly, Aston Villa left Neves completely unmarked on the edge of the box when Wolves had a free kick on the right-hand side.

Less, surprisingly, he punished them for it, slamming the ball into the right-hand side of the net, bagging himself a Goal of the Month nomination in the process.

8. Wolves 3-0 Brentford, 2018 

A lesson to all who stand in the wall when Neves has a free-kick: jump. In this case, one of the Brentford players elected not to, allowing the ball to fly over him and into the top left corner. Give Ruben an inch and he’ll take a mile. And a few goals too.

7. Wolves 2-2 Everton, 2018 

This was Neves’s first game in the Premier League, and he immediately showed the top flight what he was capable of with a signature goal.

Scoring free-kicks from such close range is no mean feat; dipping the ball quickly enough to go over the wall but under the crossbar is a skill few can master.

Neves is probably one of them, but he didn’t bother here, instead opting for sheer power, thumping it into the top corner, right next to where Jordan Pickford was standing.

6. Hull City 2-3 Wolves, 2017 

His first goal for Wolves came three minutes into his third game, and it was a complete tap in. Nah, just kidding, it was, of course, a glorious long-ranger.

Not being aware of his abilities, fans may have groaned when they saw him shaping up to shoot, but he ensured they wouldn’t do so again, sending one into the far side of the goal past a scrambling keeper.

5. Cardiff City 0-1 Wolves, 2018 

Undoubtedly his best free-kick for the club. From considerably further out than his others, he steps up and sends it into the top left to give his side the win. He’s the best Portuguese free-kick taker in the world, and yes, that includes Ronaldo. Don’t @ us.

4. Wolves 2-1 Liverpool, 2019 

It takes something pretty special to beat Liverpool these days. Thankfully, Wolves had just that in Neves.

With the ball at his feet in his favourite area of the pitch, he opts to keep it low, drilling across onto the turf and past Mignolet. The fact that it was the Belgian in goal rather than Alisson makes it slightly less impressive, but it’s a beauty nonetheless.

3. Wolves 3-0 Sheffield United, 2018

Never before has the phrase ‘postage stamp’ been more appropriate. Choosing finesse over sheer power, Neves curls one into the *very* top right corner, off the area of the woodwork where the bar and post intersect. Perfection.

2. Wolves 4-0 Espanyol, 2020

It was always going to end with the volley. Just missing out on top spot is his first goal from open play in Europe; it wasn’t a bad one.

Expertly controlling a high ball with his chest, he could wait for the ball to land like most would, but he’s not like most players. Instead, he puts his foot through it in mid-air and it flies into the back of the net.

1. Wolves 2-0 Derby, 2018

Topping this list of ridiculously good goals is the most ridiculous of them, one of those that you just can’t stop watching.

As the ball flies towards Neves, you’d perhaps expect him to try one of his typical long shots, but his first touch, which takes it behind him, surely ends all chances of that? Good one.

Pivoting his body, he hooks his right peg around the ball and towards the goal; usually, we’d say it was done it hope rather than expectation, but with him, it just seems like he knew it was going to end up in the back of the net. It did, and is not only his best ever goal, but one of the best we’ve seen.

By Finley Crebolder 

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