Reading 13 of Roy Keane’s ‘film reviews’ will leave you in hysterics
We cannot get enough of Roy Keane on Planet Football and the discovery of a Twitter account dedicated to giving film reviews in the style of Keane’s punditry has left our sides splitting.
Keane is renowned for pulling no punches with his analysis, especially when his beloved Manchester United are involved.
And his straight-talking delivery, married with the driest of humour, has seen the former Republic of Ireland international become appointment viewing on a weekly basis.
And now there’s a Twitter account called ‘Roy Keane’s Film Reviews’, that takes Keane’s unique style into the film world with hilarious results.
The decorated midfielder was once asked by Super Sunday host David Jones to list his three favourite films.
And they included the 1975 American psychological comedy-drama, ‘One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest’, which starred Hollywood legend Jack Nicholson.
He said: “One flew over the Cuckoo’s Nest is definitely in my top three, it is fantastic, yeah.“
The ex-Sunderland boss also picked out the 1994 Classic ‘Shawshank Redemption’ as one of his favourites, alongside ‘There Will Be Blood’.
“Also, ‘There Will Be Blood’ – Daniel Day Lewis – brilliant move, and ‘Shawshank Redemption’ would be my three favourites but ‘The Commitments’ – brilliant move, too.“
Keane also went on to add that Daniel Day-Lewis is his favourite actor.
51-year-old Keane spoke of his love for the 2007 drama ‘There Will Be Blood’ that starred starred the Oscar winning actor.
He hailed Day-Lewis as he added: “Amazing…absolutely brilliant in that movie [There Will Be Blood] – in that movie I thought he was absolutely fantastic.“
But we cannot get enough of these paraody reviews of classic films in Keane’s style. Neither will you…
Jaws
“So the shark is on the prowl and you’ve got these people still going into the water then they’re surprised when the shark attacks. The sharks just being a shark.
As for the mayor, he wants to get his act together. It’s poor management and it’s embarrassing.” pic.twitter.com/P313e1mm31— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) January 2, 2023
Frozen
So she’s got those ice powers. What’s she playing at?
She could be conquering the world and all she’s doing is making herself a castle and singing that song about letting it go. Don’t let it go, grab the opportunity with both hands. It’s wasted potential and it’s embarrassing. pic.twitter.com/HKIrLltCU3— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) January 22, 2023
Trainspotting
“I watched the whole thing and didn’t see a single decent train. Just a bunch of characters acting bang out of order and just being absolute liabilities.
I’ll admit I saw some of myself in Begbie, but even I wouldn’t go that far. What’s that all about?” pic.twitter.com/NlXBFmjHsu— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) January 16, 2023
The Sound of Music
“I didn’t think the title made sense to be honest.
Music doesn’t have a specific sound does it? It sounds like loads of different things and genres or whatever. I just thought that was misleading and it put me off.” pic.twitter.com/8cMQzXynLJ— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) January 20, 2023
The Banshees of Inisherin
“The man decides he doesn’t want to talk to his friend. That’s fair enough, I don’t get what the big fuss is about? He’s made his decision so just get on with it. Why are you pestering him so much? It’s embarrassing” pic.twitter.com/wJlNkck7HR
— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) April 11, 2023
Four Weddings and a Funeral
“Weddings and funerals are just part of life, why should I care how many you’ve been to?
They’re just trying to make something out of nothing there for me, it’s embarrassing.” pic.twitter.com/Lj6fMiPzAu— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) February 6, 2023
Goodfellas
“So you’ve got your man there saying they’re these goodfellas or whatever.
From what I can see there’s nothing good about them. They’re breaking the law all over the show, it should’ve been called bad blokes, it’s embarrassing.” pic.twitter.com/I4JO0VfWzI— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) December 29, 2022
The 40-Year-Old Virgin
“How’s he managed to get to 40 and still be a virgin? Look, these things happen but you see in the film that he gets given ample opportunity and he wastes them.
You’ve got to be more clinical and make your chances count.” pic.twitter.com/1giZDTBodN— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) January 23, 2023
Jurassic Park
“A theme park based around some dodgy science breeding Dinosaurs? What did they expect was going to happen?
I mean, what’s wrong with Alton Towers or Thorpe Park? It’s just pure reckless greed it’s embarrassing.” pic.twitter.com/nt2bnjvGuO— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) January 8, 2023
Ratatouille
“So he’s a rat who can cook and he operates your man by pulling his hair?
I’m not having it. The kitchen is no place for a rat, I don’t care if he can cook or whatever. It’s unhygienic and it’s embarrassing” pic.twitter.com/qxkdTUi89H— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) January 3, 2023
Fight Club
“An underground club for fighting? Get over yourself man, take up boxing. Do something productive, it’s embarrassing. Yeah, the twist is fine but it’s not enough to get it over the line for me.” pic.twitter.com/oKTx7oQYCo
— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) January 18, 2023
Daddy Day Care
“It just shouldn’t take three men to look after a baby.
There’s absolutely no teamwork, no plan and no work rate. It’s embarrassing” pic.twitter.com/E6kTTU8NFv— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) January 26, 2023
The Muppets Christmas Carol
“Y’know he’s there being visited by three ghosts on Xmas eve and you’ve got all these puppet things around him just having a laugh with the guy. This is serious stuff and you’ve got a job to do, it’s embarrassing” pic.twitter.com/Dvmn8xQUlx
— Roy Keane's Film Reviews (@roykeanereviews) December 17, 2022
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