Erling Haaland’s record-breaking opener and Trent Alexander-Arnold’s equaliser were just about the only headlines from an admittedly tame 1-1 draw between Manchester City and Liverpool – until Darwin Nunez piped up.
Despite Sky Sports trying their hardest to create a rivalry and Peter Drury evidently spending the international break writing poems on poems about every player who could possibly feature in the clash of the titans, both sides cancelled each other out on a freezing winter midday in Manchester.
The only thing colder than everybody’s hands and car steering wheels on this Saturday, though, were the tasty adidas Predator football boots that were spotted on Alexander-Arnold’s feat and the oven that was supposed to be cooking up a Premier League classic between the two sides.
Frankly, the game couldn’t have fallen more flat. Darwin Nunez was tasked with leading the line on away territory but was hooked with five minutes left to play after an incredibly frustrating day at the office where he struggled to ever really test Ederson.
Off the back of a productive international break where he looked reborn for Uruguay, one can understand why the mercurial centre forward was unhappy with his outing.
A point a piece was probably a result either side would’ve taken ahead of kick-off if offered, unless you asked Nunez that question.
The Uruguayan simply doesn’t care for peace offerings and points shared. Not when he’s perhaps the most chaotic player to grace the Barclays right now.
After the full-time whistle blew and Pep Guardiola and Jurgen Klopp embraced passionately for the cameras like they do, Nunez didn’t appear to read the room or catch the memo that – really – the result wasn’t a bad one for Liverpool in the end, who went behind in the first half and haven’t won at the Etihad since 2015.
Him not catching that memo gifted us around a minute or so of the most grimacingly cringe-worthy yet equally brilliant television we’ll get this season.
Still in full kit after being hooked shortly before the full-time whistle, Nunez wandered into view of the cameras as the two managers exchanged pleasantries with a crazy look in his eye that one would only expect to find on an episode of Monday Night RAW.
Set on Guardiola, the Uruguayan – for reasons unbeknown to just about everybody who watched – wanted a piece of the City boss and attempted to make a B-line for him in hilarious fashion.
Darwin Nunez rattling Pep. 😭 pic.twitter.com/6Fk5Sr0ZGV
— Samuel (@SamueILFC) November 25, 2023
Throw ‘My Way’ by Linkin Park over that clip and drop the colours to black and white and you’ve got the promotional package for an absolutely unbeatable WrestleMania main event right there. Rock and Stone Cold who?
Nunez, for seemingly no reason at all, appears to have absolutely lost it with the City manager and has to be talked down by Klopp.
That in itself is hilarious, but what makes the entire incident even better is just how incensed Guardiola becomes as a result of it, to the point where you start to envision him leapfrogging Klopp and ambushing Nunez like two WWE superstars weeks away from a main event bout.
Nunez is absolutely seething, which in turn completely rattles Pep, somehow creating absolute carnage from a game that was about as fiery as a burnt out sparkler in a bucket of water.
We’ve watched it several times now and still have no idea what’s set off the Uruguayan, especially off the back of his own lacklustre performance, but that’s why we absolutely love him. The guy is properly unhinged, and so is Guardiola.
For as long as City continue to hold the Premier League title hostage, all we ask is that we celebrate and cherish these two agents of chaos at every chance possible, to keep that Barclays spark alive and well.
Nunez could start a fight in an empty room – and that is content we’d all pay extortionate monthly fees to witness.
By Mitch Wilks