Arda Guler of Real Madrid CF during the La Liga match between Real Madrid and Rayo Vallecano played at Santiago Bernabeu Stadium on November 5, 2023 in Madrid, Spain.

Real Madrid’s Turkish delight is making defenders sick with his irresistible dribbling skills

Real Madrid’s worst fears were confirmed as the Jude Bellingham juice ran out in their 0-0 draw with Rayo Vallecano, the midfielder showing he is in fact mortal after all and picking up a shoulder injury.

It leaves an extremely sizeable gap in Carlo Ancelotti’s side, which is an enormous compliment to just how ridiculously good the Englishman has been since signing from Borussia Dortmund in the summer.

In a matter of months, Bellingham has all but replaced the dwindling legacy of Luka Modric and Toni Kroos, allowing them to ride off into the sunset while he smashes in goal for fun to cover for their increasing fragilities.

But no one player is immune to fate. After carrying Los Blancos on his back since August, Don Carlo must now find a solution for the Bellingham-sized hole left in his XI.

Fortunately, Real already found the answer to that problem back in the summer.

The signing of Arda Guler flew under the radar following the fanfare around Bellingham and an injury the Turkish prodigy picked up upon arrival.

That injury has quietly proven a blessing in disguise, though, allowing Ancelotti to play his latest trick card at a point in the season where the going gets tough.

And the Guler trick card appears to be extremely sweet. Unless you’re tasked with defending against him, that is. Then you’re heading into hospital and pleading for prescription doses of anti-sickness.

Guler arrived from Fenerbahce and having recovered from knee surgery, is in line to finally make his full debut for the club.

If you’ve seen anything of the 18-year-old, you’ll already be off your seat having heard the news. The kid is electric and has feet that will leave you completely dumbfounded.

Dancing around football pitches like they’re ballroom floors, Guler possesses a wicked technical ability and a skillset you’d expect to see on vintage FIFA Ultimate Team, back when joystick-wiggling was at its very peak.

Turkish delight. Our ankles and knees hurt just watching that.

Makes you sick just knowing someone so young can be so obscenely talented, doesn’t it?

Jokes on you, Arda. We’d like to see you do it on a Wednesday night against five angry men who’ve got to be on a building site at 7am the following day.

He’d probably skin them alive, without breaking much of a sweat, but we can dream about the opposite. Purely to make ourselves feel less useless.

Be it under the lights of Powerleague or the Champions League, Guler has the tools to tear it up. And we cannot wait to see him inevitably do that in the latter.

Messi has already achieved everything and Arda has to do that, he is still a child. But if we talk about potential purely, Arda has more potential than Messi,” Boldly claimed Erol Tokgozler when speaking to AS. 

Tokgozler coached Guler at youth level with Genclerbirligi, and waxed lyrical about his ceiling.

His football is in the initial phase, he must play many games to become the player he can be. But, as I say, Arda’s potential is better than Messi’s. He has that sort of potential only, of course.

Arda’s main weapon is having the ball and driving forward. He always has in mind going forward, he plays in a very vertical way, his passing is also vertical, with the goal in mind.”

A sweet tooth with a vicious streak. Guler has all the tools to become the perfect problem.

By Mitch Wilks

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